SmackDown - Feburary 26, 2019

The beginning of SmackDown this week was based on the whole Kofi Mania wave that is overtaking everything right now. Last week it was announced Kofi would take on Daniel Bryan in Fastlane. I still don’t understand what this is but apparently this involves signing a contract and it is super dramatic. They pulled out a desk and fancy chairs (that apparently are leather…the horror Daniel Bryan)! Now let’s get real here, anything that requires a big set like a table and chairs will inevitably end poorly. So right as poor Kofi is getting ready to sign his contract good ol’ Vince McMahon comes out and says the plan is to now have Kevin Owens (that we have been teased with for a few weeks with weird home videos) will now take on Daniel instead. Well great. I don’t even know this guy and he doesn’t look like an athlete. No worries here, Daniel will totally win. Everyone is all upset, and Kofi looks totally hear broken and it really just endures him more to his fan base. I am not in his fan base. I am not a fan of pancake throwing or pigtails. Sorry, Kofi, but not really sorry.

Hardy Boyz vs The Bar

It is weird to call this almost 6o year old men “boyz” but okay. These “boyz” are a tag team and are brothers. They are old and I just worry about their bodies. The Bar are young and strong and it was pretty clear they were going to lose because this was the “boyz” hometown so this whole match was a little blah to me. Glad the “boyz” got some time and love from people. Isn’t that all we want in life?

R-Truth vs Rey Mysterio vs Andrade

I would like to take a moment to formally apologize to R-Truth. At first, I was not impressed by this guy. He seemed super weird and his dance moves, while fresh, were out of place. I was wrong and I admit it. R-Truth is a gift and I fully appreciate and love him. You go, R-Truth! He was entertaining and enduring and has a lot of great athletic ability. This match was my favorite over the past two days. All men involved had amazing moves, including many flips and surprising endurance. So good. I love me some Rey Mysterio, his style is just amazing and so much fun to watch and in the combination with R-Truth’s flashy footwork and Andrade’s power it was just amazeballs. A++ guys, just really great work here! I now am a huge R-Truth fan and just love that he makes fun of John Cena. So great and just pure gold. So let’s see more R-Truth and more Jinder Mahal and maybe a little less Samoa Joe. That guy is just mean.

Charlotte Flair

So I said a little less Samoa Joe…can we add Charlotte Flair in there? I feel like she should have protected her dad a little more and prepped for her SmackDown speech a little less. Like I get it, you are a heel and bad girl and everything. Cool. I get it, you are wearing black and have really heavy makeup. I don’t even know what she said, something about Becky and Ronda I’m sure. I just tune out now. *Yawn*

Aleister Black & Ricochet vs Shinsuke Nakamura & Rusev

Why are these two people on another show? Didn’t I get enough of them last night? Apparently not. Apparently WWE really wants me to just love these new NXT dudes. Sorry, the more I see them the more I actually like them even less. Like I was on the Rico bus but now that I’ve had to see him over and over I’m not a fan. I’m also still annoyed by the entrance budget for Black. Why does he get so many props?! Can we add them to the “less is more list” and just move on? They won. Again. Which is just so annoying to me. Like I do not for one second believe that Rusev could be beat by either of these rookies. That’s all I’m going to say about that. Done.

Kevin Owens & Kofi vs Daniel Bryan & Rowan

I don’t understand the reason for this match. I also fell asleep through part of it because Kevin Owens bores the crap out of me. I love me some Daniel Bryan but they didn’t let him actually wrestle in this match and it was just a nice little Kevin Owens showcase. Snore. I’m not looking forward to this guy being back. Kofi doesn’t need this dude so I hope this dude gets beat at Fastlane and we can just go back to me being annoyed at pancakes and pigtails. Daniel Bryan is better than this. Just such a poor use of his talent and genius. Nice try, WWE.